I remember back then thinking how 30 seemed soooo old and how far away that age seemed to me. Even when I clocked 30 and then got older than 30, my brain refused to accept it. Luckily, I look way younger. I remember going with my friend’s kids to their English high school and having one of the “seniors” in the school hit on me. This left me with mixed feelings. Hmmm. I thought to myself, I probably look 16, max 20 and then “Oh gosh! I deserve more respect”. Generally, I like the fact that I look pretty young. However, this seems to turn against me at work and when I go to places with age restrictions. Generally, do I like being in my 30s? The answer is “Yes”.
Going back on track…
By 30, there are some things that everyone should know….
Making timelines for your life is generally a waste of time
No matter how much you plan, sometimes things just don’t happen the way you want them to and that’s fine. Life never stays constant. What seemed like a good idea at 30 may turn out to be a very bad idea at 35. It is always better to plan in stages and take actions accordingly while staying totally open to changes. Also, do not focus on ticking clocks for things nor give in to societal pressures for anything.
Have zero tolerance for stupidity and bullshit
Be smart. Know what interests you. Broaden your range of interests. Read up stuff. Be more aware of what’s going on in the world and be empathic. However, remember that no one knows EVERYTHING about everything. There’s no shame in not knowing and owning up to the fact that you don’t know something about something. Pretending to be smart doesn’t really make you smart. Also disassociate from people who say really dumb stuff and have nothing useful whatsoever to offer.
Know who your true friends are and hold them dear
I come from a culture where anyone you have ever smiled at is referred to as a friend and those close to you were your close friends or best friends. Calling someone an acquaintance just sounds like an insult! I had to learn that those I called my close friends were my actual friends and to keep in touch with them. As we grow older, we evolve. So do friendships. As painful as it may seem, we have to accept that not every childhood friend or person you ever smiled at stays in your life forever.
Have a more rounded view on things (politics, religion, culture)
I grew up conservative and I still am. However, I listen to what others have to say. I read both non-conservative news and conservative news and I choose what I want to believe. It’s normal to be see things through your own lenses but you need to try and see what others are seeing through their own lenses and how things affect everyone in general as it helps to keep things in perspective.
You don’t have to follow fashion trends.
By 30, you should know your style and what fits you best. The fact that there is something new in town doesn’t mean that it would work for you. Really, not all fashion trends are worth trying out.
You are allowed to change your mind or stance on things
Changing your mind doesn’t mean you are fickle. It just means that you are smart enough to know that situations change and views and opinions evolve. Changing attitudes for better ones also helps to improve your life.
Love is more than a feeling
Romance movies give a skewed version of love. Lust never holds a relationship for long. Other things like friendship, respect and such, come into play. Love is not just a feeling; it’s a choice that is made every single day. You can choose to ignore the annoying little habits, to be kind, to support, to forgive, to be kind, to respect, to put the person first sometimes, to be faithful and so on. Relationships take work – sometimes it’s easy and sometimes it’s hard. It is up to you to choose how you want to act, react, think and speak in a relationship.
In every situation, you can either choose to see and dwell on the positive or negative side. The choice is up to you.
The good things in life are what make it worth living. Focusing on only the negative things leaves you in a constant state of dissatisfaction and unhappiness. This does not mean you should live in a perpetual bubble, not use your common sense and ignore warning signs.
Be more than just a spectator in this thing called “life”
Going through life scared of and being tossed around by every force and not doing anything unless you are forced to do it is no longer acceptable. Think and weigh your options before you act. Take charge of your life!
It is not possible to be very rich in a twinkle of an eye, at least not legally.
We all see ads of how people made plenty cash by just clicking on things on the internet or won a lottery. This is hardly ever true. Making of money comes as a result of a vision, hard work and perseverance.
Your health is your most valuable asset
You should realize this by now. Doing a full body checkup at least once a year is essential. Do not be scared to find out what the doctor might find. “What you don’t know won’t hurt you” doesn’t apply when it comes to your health. “The earlier the better” saves lives. It saved mine.
Do not focus on what people will say
The truth is that only a few people are truly concerned about you. By nature, people tend to talk about others especially if your situation makes them feel better of themselves, they are jealous of you or they just don’t really get your situation. Always ask yourself who is really going to take responsibility for the decision that is to be made. If the answer is you, then you should focus on “YOU”
A little vulnerability isn’t bad
Being vulnerable is not synonymous with being weak. A little vulnerability makes you human and easy for others to relate with you. Just as we are made up of our victories, we are also made up of our mistakes, fears, and shortcomings. These help craft the person that we are and are what help us relate, learn and grow.
You are not too old for anything
You are not too old to travel. You are not too old to make new friends. You are not too old to get a new job. You are not too old to act like a cheapskate. You are not too old to be classy. You are not too old to go to an amusement park. You are not old to just chill out with friends. You are not to old to start a new relationship… Really, you are not!